A JV Christmas in Greshlahem

We had a very delightful Christmas in Portland. On Christmas Eve day, Gretchen and I enjoyed a wonderful run on a sunny day, came home and had a last minute run to the grocery store. Then we were off to a double service night with the Portland JV’s. First on the schedule was downtown chapel, a parish in the middle of downtown where my friend Garrett works in their drop in center. It is a very simple chapel with brightly colored walls and a cement floor. We sang traditional carols and listened to a homily about Christ coming to bring out the best in the least in society; to give those people that were rejected by everyone else a glimmer of hope and integrity, to make them feel loved and wanted. He acknowledged the congregations propensity for service and encouraged them to continue to serve others so that we could help to bring them the humanity they deserve like Christ did.

After the service, we walked the few blocks to Pioneer Square to admire the Christmas tree with a nice cup of coffee before our next stop. After warming up slightly we headed over to Night Watch – an evening drop in center for homeless. When we walked in, the smell of smoke and BO was overwhelming. I felt incredibly out of place in my purple pea coat, big golden earrings and shiny flats. I didn’t feel like pushing my way past the crowded rows of men who didn’t look like they wanted to get real cozy with their neighbors, so I stood in the back with most of the other JV’s. I was impressed with the few volunteers that did find a seat amongst the homeless men and women who called each other family. We sang carols between readings of the Christmas story from the Gospels and then the man in charge gave a great talk about the circumstances of Mary and Joseph and Jesus around the time of Jesus’ birth. They were homeless, a pregnant unwed mother, born in a dirty stable outside the city limits. Christ was meant for the people sitting in that room. He was one of those people sitting in that room. Many other points were made that may have resonated more with the people sitting in that room, but as a person of privilege to be there with the people Christ was intended for was a very powerful experience.

When the service was over hot drinks were served and sweet treats were passed. I finally made my way up to the front of the room and into a conversation about economics with one homeless man. It was very interesting – talking about how there is such a huge disparity between the rich and poor, a conversation I’ve never had with someone on the other end of the spectrum, and he was very wise. We talked about how trickle-down economics may sound good in theory when compared to feeding a horse: if you give him enough food, there will be feed left over for the birds. But money is not so finite. Greed is a thing that cannot be satiated, money will keep going into a void that cannot be filled, and none will be left to fall to those less fortunate. Something to think about…

Then he trailed off to talking about Hari Krishna and throwing around a bunch of names and concepts I couldn’t follow…. But it was good while it lasted J

The JV’s retired to Greshlahem for the evening - I quickly whipped up some breakfast casseroles to sit overnight, then relazedd in our family room admiring our fat Christmas tree complete with colored lights, popcorn strings, and tin-foil star. There was a little guitar playing and carol singing, but the night dissolved into laughter as we filled the family room with 5 mattresses for all 11 of us to sleep, and steamrolled each other before falling asleep to Home Alone.

Christmas Morning I awoke earlier than everyone else. I cleaned the kitchen and put the casseroles in the oven. Gretchen helped get the table ready and people slowly started to wake up and wander into the kitchen. We sat around the table all together, like a good JV family and enjoyed pumpkin pancakes, fruit salad, and a choice of vegetarian or sausage casserole. Eventually people went back to their homes, Gretchen and I put our first turkey in the oven, and we spent the afternoon opening the few presents under the tree and calling family members. Gresham shared a Delicious Christmas dinner (hauling our amazing turkey in the car) with Portland Mac, and rounded out the night with drinks and pool at a new bar that opened up a few blocks away.

Overall, a very merry Christmas!

Simplicity in a Season of Consumerism

Each month the JVC staff sends out monthly challenges based one one of the four values of JVC. This month it was Simplicity during the season of excess and mass consumerism.

This holiday season, we JV's in Gresham decided that it was time to clean out our pantry. We've noticed that we tend to eat only the foods we really like to eat, going to the store to replenish our stock of favorites and allowing food on our pantry to pile up, and left overs in the fridge to go uneaten. After a few months of occasionally having to throw out vegetables rotting in the bottom of our fridge, and oranges drying up on out counters, it was time to get better about our food consumption. We started a few weeks before the actual week of December challenges: buying only a few necessities on the weekend such as lettuce, apples, eggs and cheese, then slowly using the foods that have been taking up room in our pantry and hiding in the back of the refrigerator. We continued this for about the third week when we joined the JVC staff in their challenges.

Though breakfasts and lunches were sometimes a challenge, it was really cleansing and invigorating to get creative around meal time. We aren't throwing food out anymore and discovered that we had so much food to work with! Another part of our challenge that helped is that we added two more community meals to our weekly schedule. Not only did we use our food more efficiently - making one meal for 6 people rather than 6 individual meals - were were spending more quality time together around the dinner table, being more present to each other, and laughing a lot more. One tasty example is our community dinner from last night: Potato and onion curry, fried rice with pineapple, eggs and broccoli, and Afghan flat bread - all made with ingredients that had been in our pantry for almost a month-DELICIOUS!

We also planned our first energy fast for last Tuesday. We decided as community that we would not use any hot water, not turn on any lights, not plug in anything that didn't need to be plugged in (we left the refrigerator on, but didn't use the oven, stove, microwave or toaster), and were also challenged to not use our cell phones for the day. I messed up right away: I got out of bed, went into the bathroom and turned on the light then immediately turned it off saying "SHOOT!"... or something like that. The day went pretty smoothly. I went to work, then to the gym and worked out reading a book rather than listening to my ipod. I cam home to a dark house and my roommates huddled in out breakfast nook - the kitchen lit up with candles. I made myself a sandwich and grazed in the pantry for a while. We spent our evening playing cards by candle light, commenting on how nice it was to wake up to the natural light in the morning and sharing about our days. Though we may have wanted to just check-out and throw on a movie, we were able to spend a pleasant evening and quality time together in good conversation. Though I did appreciate being able to turn on the lights the next morning.

'Tis the Season

It felt a little bit more like Christmas last week, what with the temperature in the 20's and the crazy Gresham wind-chill making it feel below zero. I sported my purple pea coat constantly and was regretting leaving all my gloves at home. But the weather has warmed, the rain has returned, and Christmas is on its way.

I was home for Thanksgiving, and it was great to get a breath of fresh air, spend some time with family, hang out with Ian and Annie, Mike and Tig, and Kim. We got have some great conversations about philosophy, theology, and spirituality with insight from my JV experience. But it was a little strange. Being in Bellevue which is so ostentatious and ridiculously excessive, in addition to feeling like my parent's house is not my home - not where I grew up, and sleeping on the couch because the couples had the beds was just a little lonely. Gresham definitely felt more like home when I got back.

For those of you who don't know already, I am not going home for Christmas this year. If you know me well, you know I'm very attached to my traditions: Christmas eve at my parent's house, 11:00 candle light service at church, wake up (usually to Ian hitting me with a pillow or something equally obnoxious), waiting for mom to shower while we get the eggnog and tasty breakfast breads ready, opening stockings, then everyone taking turns opening gifts until there's nothing left. Gifts are followed by brunch - usually french toast and sausage or bacon, going for a family walk with the dog, watching a movie, and calling family until it's time for Christmas dinner at Grandma's house that always includes pickled herring, Swedish potato sausage, more gifts and game playing.

But not this year. I still feel a little funny about it... first Christmas not at home. It's been hard to explain to people. I feel like I have no excuse: I'm only three hours away (closer than I was at school) and who doesn't go home for Christmas? They don't get it. Well it was going to be a strange holiday anyway. Ian and Annie, now married and splitting their time between two families, are going to Colorado. And as a JV, we are encourage to really think about spending the holidays at our placements and doing something in the spirit of JVC. We are challenged to combat the consumerism and excess of the season and to try to return to the true spirit of Christmas. I am committed to this experience, and it so limited. I have one year with the support of this organization to really try and explore and understand the core values of community, spirituality, simplicity and social justice. I have one year to learn and grow with my roommates. I have one year to do something different. I will miss my family, and my Christmas routine. I'm worried about my mom and dad being sad without the kids around, and the smaller and stranger dinner at Grandma's, but I'm kind of excited to make this experience my own. It will be strange trying to accommodate different holiday traditions with all the Portland JV's that are sticking around, and I will probably get frustrated with not having things go the way I want them to, but I hope that we can serve the community around us and share some insights, and have a very special celebration.

Where did November go?

I know, I know... I've been a neglectful blogger, but November was just so jam-packed with stuff I couldn't find the time to sit down and write about it all. Here are the important highlights.

Retreat: we spent a long weekend on a small bay on Whidbey Island, full of beautiful nature trails, breathtaking views of the sound, and endless conversation about personality types and communication within our community. It was fun to spend some more time with some JV's I hadn't seen since Orientation (some that I didn't remember at all... oops) and to go deeper with the JV's I already knew. The weekend culminated with a coffee shop/talent show where Sean and I showed off our Styrofoam Snowflake skills with our acoustic rendition of Marvin Gaye's "Lets Get it On" and City High's "What Would You Do." The crowds cheered. It was great.

Team Gresham Represent!

Styrofoam Snowfakes perform "Let Get it On"

Nutrition Classes: Work seemed to fly by this month because I was constantly occupied with all the minute details of making my nutrition classes run smoothly. I had to make a shopping list each week, check it with the instructor, who checked with the curriculum provider, then I made revisions and rechecked everything. I also had to make sure we had enough childcare providers for the 15 rowdy hispanic kids the participants traipsed to each class. I couldn't make it to two of the Saturday classes, so I had to make sure all correct food was purchased and designated as "in class" use or "give away" food, and make sure the Staff person taking over for me knew when to be where and what to do. It was pretty stressful, especially when our Executive Director decided I should be the one to buy all the food. This meant I got to spend $350 each Friday at 4 different grocery stores to try and get enough food for 15 participants to eat in class and take the ingredients home. A little hectic. But so worth it. The classes were a huge hit and participants were so grateful for the opportunity to learn and to hang out with each other :) Now it's onto data processing and report writing... awesome.

Weekend at the Coast: We got to spend one weekend in Lincoln City on the coast hosted by Renata's Godmother at a house she was house sitting for the month of November. It was so nice and relaxing to be in a warm home and hang out on the beach. We went on a long hike that wound it's way out to a rocky bluff that looked out on the ocean and a beach full of sea lions. That night we all fell asleep watching a movie and woke up to fresh baked banana bread and a whole Turkey in the oven being cooked so we could have meet for Sandwiches for our drive home. We drove down to Newport beach and spent a few hours playing and taking pictures on the rainy beach, got some sea food and saltwater taffy in town, and headed home.

On the Cold and Blustery Bluff on our Hike

Newport Beach

Jumping Picture - check out my sweet Karate Kick :)

End of October Update

A few noteworthy items from the end of the month since I have abandoned my blog for a few weeks:

Gym Membership: Why, you might ask, would I be waking up at 5:45 AM on my late start day? I could lay comfortably in bed until 1 Pm if I felts so inclined. But instead, I wake up before the sun does, and get on a bike, and travel one mile to use our new and wonderful gym membership. The reason is that we finagled out way into using one gym membership for 5 people. And it's not breaking any rules. It works out to be about $11/month per person if we have the membership until at least May. The deal is that we have one primary, and pay an extra little fee so that the primary can swipe in two people with him for free when ever he goes to the gym. This means that poor Tomás has to go to the gym twice a day. He works out in the morning before work with two people, then swipes in two people after work. I work late on Wednesday and Thursday, so if I want to work out those days I gotta get up at the crack of dawn. I thought I would hate it, bit it's actually pretty great to get up and get going. I have tons of time in the morning to do anything I want: write letters, practice the guitar, make lunch for my roommates, read... I never thought I was a morning person, but maybe I'm changing :)

First Public Performance: If you weren't aware yet, I am finally putting my musical skills to use. I, Erin Cooley, am part of a band. My friend Sean in one of the Portland houses and I have formed a band called the Styrofoam Snowflakes (based and his traumatic childhood experience with packing peanuts). We play acoustic covers of Top 40 and Hip-Hop songs including Beyonce's If I Were A Boy, Rihanna's Umbrella, Down Down Down by Jay Sean, Hey Ya - Outkast, and of course some Damien Rice, Tristan Prettyman, and Ingrid Michaelson thrown in the mix. Our most popular song: What Would You Do by City High - brings me back to middle school. Not gonna lie, I can sing and play guitar, Sean just likes to be loud and dance in front of people. But it's fun. And it's motivation to play my guitar that has been sadly neglected for the past few years. On Halloween, we had a cute little performance in the attic of the Portland Morris house in the middle of their epic party. I was SUPER nervous, but I believe it was a success ;) We may be making an appearance at the Retreat we have this weekend.

New Addition to the Gresham House: The lovely nuns at Bridal Veil down the road sent us a PIANO! it is big and beautiful and sits nicely in our dining room. Though I haven't played in a very very long time, I find myself spending a good chunk of my afternoons plunking my way through the thick book of Disney hits. I love it. I love music. I love making music. This is going to mean good things.

Putting my Whitworth Education to good use, Who woulda Thunk it? - so a little progress on my frustration with Catholicism: I lead a discussion on Niebuhr's Christ and Culture Models for my spirituality night last week. As much as Whitworthians complain about Core, it was such a great background to have and be able to more universally talk about how you view the world, how you know what you know, and what you think the relationship of faith an culture is. I essentially gave one of the Core 350 lectures to my roommates to explain these christ and culture models and it was really interesting to see where the discussion took us afterwards. Not just the role of Christ, but God and Faith in general. Who would have thought I would be so thankful for Core.

Any who, this weekend my roommates and I are going up to Whidbey Island to hang out with all the JV's from Seattle, Tacoma, Yakima, and Portland for the Cascade Region's fall retreat. The focus is right relationship. It will be nice to have a little break from Gresham, and hopefully I'll come back rejuvenated and ready for the busy holiday season.

Catholicism and Conflict

Last night for sprituality night we had our neighbor/support couple/parish youth director over to facilitate a conversation about some beef my catholic housemates have with the catholic church. This stemmed from a contemplative mass we went to two weeks ago at the Jesuite parish where the homily reading were from the Genesis passage where Eve is created from Adam's rib, and a Gospel passage about marriage and divorce. The Homily left people wanting more. There was potential for so much to come from these readings and the priest kept his main points to that of  "Jesus thinks Divorce is a sin."

Our discussion was mainly centered around the role of women in the church and how the church can remain relevant in a changing society. I learned a lot about the priesthood, why it is limited to celibate men and so on. Crunchy (youth director) made an interesting point: the priest is in charge of so much, he is solely responsible for what goes on in his parish on the business end, the religious end, and everything in between ; so how could he do all that successfully and also be a good husband and father? But I asked how he sees that in relation to protestant churches. He said that in his experience, protestant churches have a big spread of power. There is a head pastor, and associate pastors, and deacons etc. But that doesn't work in the Catholic church because they try to maintain unity and "control" by keeping the chain of command very short.  If a bishop needs to check in with a parish, he only has to talk to one person to know everything that is going on in that parish. And the whole woman thing: besides Crunchy and the priests, all of the parish employees that make the church run are women. Many with masters in divinity. The same degree that priests have. So maybe there will be a change in the future. who knows....

But this discussion left me confused. I was learning a lot, but all this talk about catholicism was unsettling. After a conversation with my parents I realized what was bothering me... I think... The separation of Catholics and Protestants. I feel like I am placing so much emphasis on the differences when we come from the same family. I guess the minimal theology classes and history classes I took at Whitworth felt fairly ecumenical. Catholic church history is my church history too, to an extent. I can't reconcile the institutionalism of the catholic church. It is just such a big presence and personality that it's sometimes hard for me to see Christ beyond the politics. And to rub salt in the wound, I have a housemate who cannot miss a Sunday mass. Not that that is a bad thing, but he feels that it is a sin not to take communion every sunday at mass. So if I want to go to a protestant church and invite my housemates to join me (like I am this Sunday), he will wake up extra early to first go to mass, then come to my church service. I feel like he's saying I'm not good enough. But don't we worship the same God at each church? Doesn't God know what's on his heart when he sits down in a worship service? Where's the unity? Where's the trust? Where's the reconciliation? I don't know.

Perfect Autumn Day

For our community event this past week, my housemates and I decided to spend the day in Hood River and head out to the apple orchards on Sunday. I've heard a lot about Hood River - Ian's best friend Joel is from there - so I was excited to finally see the place. We got into town after a lazy sunday morning around 1:30 and met up with Joel for some coffee and catching up. We swapped stories from our community with those of his girlfriend Christine's experience with JVC in New Jersey, and got the quick tour Hood River - it's not that big. It was nice to spend time with a familiar face. We left Joel to spend the rest of his birthday (I forgot it was his b-day, woops) with friends and continued on our adventure. We hopped on a windy road up into the mountains that led us through scenic viewpoints of Mt. Hood and Mt. Adams and found our way to Rasmussen Farms. This place was AWESOME! Though not as big as Green Bluff back in Spokane, it definatly made me sad I hadn't gone more often when I had the chance. Rasmussen farms had a pumpkin patch, hot cider, a corn maze, and barrels of apples and squash for the taking. By the time we got there, it was late afternoon, the sun was low and golden, the air crisp and fresh, it was the perfect fall day. We wandered through the corn maze, picked out some delicious looking pears, apples, and squash to take home, and then got to pick out our pumpkins! Because we used community money for the pumpkins (we're going to roast the seeds and make pie/soup from the flesh), we tried to keep them pretty small, but it was hard to find the right one. I probably took the longest to finally decide, but we were all happy with our choices. Now we just have till the week before Halloween to carve into those suckers. We finished the day off with a nice Full Sail beer at the brewery back in the Hood. 

Whitworth Wedding Weekend

My friend Ben Parker got married this past Saturday in Portland. In addition to being a beautiful wedding, it was also an wonderful reunion of my Whitworth friends in good 'ol P-town. I got to spend the day running some errands with Annie D - a breath of fresh air to be with someone who get you instantly and doesn't have to work so hard to just be. Once at the church in Lake Oswego, it was like a constant excitment fest. I kept seeing one person after another - some whom I hadn't expected see and some whom I had only hoped I'd get to see again. I know I'm a usually smiley person, but there was a perma-grin on my face for the whole evening. The ceremony was beautiful and Christ centered - even though Lindsay and I couldn't stop chatting - and the reception full of joking around and good catching up. After a little cake and dancing, we wished the happy couple well, ushered them in to the elevator of the hotel then Annie, Nate, Dan and I headed out to McMenamin's Crystal Ballroom for a beer. I can't explain how great it was to catch up with these people who were fundamental in my growing up, in how I became who I am today, who know me and love me for who I am, who I don't have to prove myself to, who I have a common story with. I was able to talk about life and spirituality and receive unconditional love and support. And to simply laugh with good people. A wonderful night with good friends: i felt at home.

makes me home sick for whitworth

Success!!

I've had a breakthrough! Okay, so this whole "Keep Yourself Healthy" class series has been a real downer, but it is something that I am really interested and should be excited about planning. So finally today I feel like am getting there. The classes weren't working out on Tuesday night: it wasn't ideal for patients, the teacher we wanted just started water aerobics instructing classes on tuesdays, and I would have had to add a third late night to my schedule... no good. BUT what about Saturday? The space we want to use is most likely available, our teacher is ready and excited to teach, and our patients preferred a morning class to a late night class. YAY! I also got to spend most of this morning designing a pretty awesome looking flyer, got great feedback from my boss and successfully navigated a phone conversation in Spanish to figure out how to best advertise. I feel all warm and fuzzy inside.

Next week - nail down dates, figure out curriculum, and start signing people up!

By the way - our clinic manager was sick on Wednesday, and I got to run clinic ALL BY MYSELF... well with the help of our nurse... but only a little. I was the go-to Spanish speaker for intake and rocked it :)

Fall is here.

I’m not quite sure how it happened. Almost all of September was Beautiful and sunny and somewhere around 80 degrees. But slowly in the last week, the mornings have been a little more crisp, infiltrating our poorly insulated house. The afternoon sun has been more amber, not quite as bright. Maybe because I’m not in school for the first time in 17 years this I wasn't ready for it to come. It really hit me last night and this morning. I walked home barely avoiding the drizzle, hoping to bike out to Powell Butte with Gretchen and go for a short evening hike. I don’t know if it was just the clouds but by the time I was home at 6:15 it was so dark! I don’t remember it being this dark when I got home from work last week. The only real option was to throw on the sweats, make a nice warm pasta and drink a glass of wine with the girls. After work activities are no longer an option. Then this morning on late-start Wednesday, I got up to go for a run, but couldn’t make myself get out of my warm bed and expose myself to our cold house. Eventually I did and got ready to go running and had to throw on my long sleeve shirt so I didn’t catch a cold.

Dark Skies, Long Sleaves, and Sweats. Fall is Here.

Oh spanish...

Something Lynn said in our meeting bothered me. In the process of trying to develop this program and make sure that the Latinos that express interest actually attend, they need a person that encourage them to come. Lynn told me  “You are white, and if they don’t quite understand everything you say, they’ll say yes but not show up. You need a Latino to be in charge of patient communication.” 

That makes sense, but was a major ego killer. I was just coming out of another dagger to the heart from the night before at the Latino Patient Advisory Counsel. I could communicate well enough, but you get enough Hispanics in a room they just rattle off with all the nuances of the Spanish language and slurring of words. I understood the gist of everything, but definitely not word for word. Being the only Gringa in the room was definitely intimidating. I was getting more and more confident with my Spanish at clinic, but this was definite proof that I am not where I need to be with my Spanish skills. I speak well, and my roommates are encouraging, but I need to be able to communicate better. Bummer.

Manténgase Saludable

So I was pulled into a meeting two weeks ago with our Executive Director and the Kaiser summer intern to discuss a Grant that we were awarded. We were awarded a grant based on our proposal to provide nutrition education and healthy cooking classes to the latino population that our clinic serves as a way to be involved in diabetes/hypertension/obesity education and prevention. Sounds pretty exciting, right? I thought so... until I realized that the summer intern was about to take off back to school and the reason I was involved in the meeting was because this is now MY project. So here I am, two weeks later, losing my the summer intern/grant author tomorrow, about to be left out on my own on this project, and completely overwhelmed. 

Up until yesterday things had gone fairly smoothly. I was calling locations: churches and schools with kitchen and childcare facilities, narrowed it down to a few to visit. Went to a local middle school and decided that their facility was probably the best. I even presented to the Latino Patient Advisory Counsel – a meeting of our Latino patients to get their input on the services we’re offering, a meeting all in Spanish mind you – to get their opinion on what days and times would be best for classes. Things seemed to be going well.

Then Yesterday morning I had a meeting with the woman who runs a very similar… well pretty much the same… program through the OSU extensions office. The intern and I were supposed to go together, but she was shadowing in the ER, so I was on my own. My intention was to get some information about their program and some helpful tips and resources about running our own. Little did I know that I was walking into the lions Den. The woman was not happy that we were “trying to reinvent the wheel” of a well-known and well-oiled program. She was frustrated that we didn’t use them in the grant writing process and after a lot of discussion and trying to convey that I wasn’t involved in the grant writing process and didn’t know if our ED was aware that we could partner with them, she reluctantly decided to let us use their curriculum, and perhaps even teach the classes herself. Though our meeting ended with a hug, it was an awkward and tense experience, and now there is even more pressure on me to make sure our program is well advertised and well attended so that Lynn’s time is used well and we don’t create any more conflict. Yikes – not what I was expecting

Ciao Amiga

We once were 7, now we are 6. I've heard stories about JV's leaving their communities, but I never thought it would be mine. My roommate Meagan left us last wednesday. She told us a week before she left that she was going through some personal stuff, couldn't be herself in the house and had decided to go back home. It was weird though, because as soon as she told us this secret that she had been carrying around, everything started to mesh a lot better. We got a lot closer in her last week here. But none the less, it's hard to deal with a lot of personal stuff in a new place with new people. So she's back in New York, hopefully feeling better, and hopefully gonna stay in touch. She had her negative moments, but I think we could have been the support she needed if she had let us. I'll miss her hugs and her laughter, but hopefully we'll see her again.

Labor Day Weekend

I know I'm a little over due for a blog post, so I'll do a few to make up for it :)

Labor day weekend I took my room

mates home to Seattle!  It was awesome... well... at least by the end. It was transformational for our community for sure.

My parents were visiting the rest of the fam in the bay area for the weekend, so we had the house to our selves. When we first showed up, I was nervous as usual, about to invite my roommates deeper into my life - I felt pretty exposed. They were all in awe of the trees, and excited to be in such a beautiful home, going crazy sliding across the wood floors... but I was pulling back thinking to myself "why the hell did I bring these strange people to my home. They don't get me. This is weird. I just want to go hide." So I did. After everyone was set up with a place to sleep I went to bed first.

Saturday, I woke up early and went on my usual run through the woods, and came home refreshed and de-stressed and ready to play hostess and tour guide. We had an incredible day doing all the touristy things you gotta do in Seattle: walked from Capitol hill where my roommates met my friend Whitney, through down town, through pikes place, ate the donuts, watched the fish be thrown, got coffee at the first Starbucks, walked to the space needle, then ended with a nice happy hour back on Capitol hill. That night we went to the JV party at the Seattle Cherry Abby house and were suprised to be greeted so excitedly - EVERYONE was awaiting the arrival of the GRESHAM house. Who knew we were so popular? But this is where we really bonded - we were our go-to people, we danced together, we drank together, we had fun together. It was 

great.

Sunday I took them all on a very wet hike to Franklin Falls (pics at top), then we had a nice after noon of movie watching and warming up with some tea. Then I took everyone to my home church to give all my catholic roommates a taste of my protestant upbringing. It was so good to be home. It really showed me what I'm missing in my spiritual life during mass. And then during communion the band played "Be Though My Vision," the song I sang at Ian and Annie's wedding - and I lost it. My family was all together, without me, in California. I was home with these people who are slowly getting to know me better, and there was no one at the 6 o'clock service that I had expected to see. I tried to hold back the tears, but I couldn't. After the service I tried to compose myself, but ended up sitting down and crying in the narthex in front of my roommates. I eventually recovered, and we headed to a coffee shop on the Ave to discuss how we felt about the service and had some great discussion about where we are all at in our spiritual lives, what we value in our faith journeys, we talked a lot about catholic culture and guilt, which is so foreign to me. Then we finished off our intense conversation at the Compline service at St. Mark's on Capitol hill and left the service of Chanting monks a little more relaxed and reflective.  A great day.

Love

I love my job.

I had the best day at work today. It was another grown up day. I started out in our office downtown on Overton, then went an orientation meeting with the Coalition of Community Heath Clinics - the coalition that our clinic and 12 others like it belong to that are providing no-to-low cost health care for those that our health care system has left in the dust. The people at the coalition are the people who help clinics communicate to each other, share resources and ideas, and they are the ones that put into motion all the referrals that I start during clinic. To have this incredible network of advocacy and support for those who are not provided for by the government is incredible. These people do amazing things and I am so excited to be a part of the work they have set in motion.

After orientation it was off to a manager's meeting/happy hour hosted by the coalition. Yet another venue for clinic managers to update each other on the new happenings in their clinics and try and help each other trouble shoot. I ate my fondu and listened to Angie from Inside Out talk about her need for a new Dermatologist to direct the tattoo removal program. This may seem somewhat trivial, but tattoo removal for someone who is trying to get out of the gang scene and turn their life around, or a man who got a swastika tattooed on his chest in prison and now has a two year son and doesn't want his son to grow up in an environment of hate, or a homeless youth with tattoos all over their face trying to get a job and get off the street Tattoo removal can mean rebirth. 

These people running these clinics are Saints. They are crusaders for love and respect. They want everyone to claim their human right to live a full and healthy life. Without the coalition, thousands of people would have no where to go. I was doing a referral tonight and as the man left my office he said to me "It's such an incredible service you people do. You have no idea." Another woman shook my hand earnestly and said "Que dios te bendiga. Muchisimas gracias" - God bless you. Thank you so much.

Eventful Week

A lot has happened in a week, so I'll just do a quick recap:

On saturday we had an all day painting party that was also youth event for the parish. We spent roughly 9 hours painting the downstairs common areas of our house with our neighbor (and youth director of the church) and 7 or 8 high schoolers. The kitchen now has yellow walls in addition to the already light green cabinets, orange countertops and purple doors, our dining room is a beautiful espresso brown with a "sand dune" beige accent wall, and our living room is a deep crater lake blue with an espresso brown harem (it has  little nook we call the harem or love nest). The hallways each got a fresh coat of beige and the bathroom is yellow as well. Its starting to feel a little more like home. After the long day of painting, my old roommates mom was dropping off her youngest daughter at George Fox and stopped by to say hello. It was so nice to see a familiar face - I  think I hugged her harder than I've hugged anyone in a long time. Then our house joined Crunchy (our neighbor) and the kids for a viewing of Back to the Future outside in our shared backyard.

Sunday my parents came out to take me to an early birthday lunch! It was so nice to be able to show them where I live and explore the city a little bit. I took them to Cafe Delirium, the local cafe in Gresham where my house spends a lot of time, out to lunch on trendy 23rd, down to the sunday market, and out to Mt. Tabor fora pretty view of the city. They were able to meet most of my roommates, which was fun. Everyone thought my parents were super cute - Gretchen says her favorite thing is meeting parents. It makes the world make sense :)

Tuesday: a lot of things happened... My work day was full of meetings, which is always interesting. I learn a lot about what wallace does and get to contribute to making it better. At the end of our big team meeting, the office had a delicious chocolate cake for me and sang an early happy birthday to me. It was very sweet:) This was also the day that MCAT scores are released, and they were supposed to be released the same time that my team meeting started  - so when the singing was over, I rushed back to my office to check, but no luck. Scores weren't released until 6pm. Gretchen and I borrowed Crunchy's internet to check our scores after dinner... me first... and I'm happy! I'm not taking them again anyway. I got a score that was at the lower end of what I wanted, but I think it's good enough. So now I can just sit back and relax until I start applying to medical school in 8 months! 

One more big  thing happened on tuesday - one of my roommates told the community that she's leaving . She didn't go into too much detail, but she's dealing with some personal stuff that she can't resolve here, so next wednesday she's flying back to New York. So there are some big changes to be had. I have a meeting with our area director today to check in about the situation.

Wednesday: My Birthday! I'm now officially 22. It was a wonderful and relaxing day. I got up and made myself some breakfast pancakes, read my book, talked a lot of friends and family, treated myself to a salad at cafe delirium for lunch and headed off to work at 2. It was an awesome clinic! I was in charge of referrals and it was great! I also was able to talk about my MCAT score with our medical director, and laugh and chit chat with all the medical providers between patients. I am bonding with my coworkers and just having a great time. When I got home, my roommates had prepared a feast of hummus, bruschetta, birthday cake and beer and we had a nice little birthday party. Over all a good day.

This weekend the community is headed to Seattle to visit the other JV houses for Labor day. I'm going to be taking my roommates to my church on Sunday and then to Compline gregorian chanting at St. Marks on capitol hill for our spirituality night this week, so I'm really excited to hear their thoughts.

Not Quite There

It's been interesting trying to live with 7 new roommates. I've been having a lot of out of body experiences lately, examining my situation as though I were removed from it, and it just seems so strange! I'm living with 7 people who a month ago I didn't know existed. We are all forced to become a support system from each other, but how can we do that when we don't know each other well enough to know what each person needs. We are constantly putting  each other in boxes, clinging to the little tid-bits that we've been able to learn in the three weeks we've shared a living space (it still feels too much like an office space, not quite a home).

I never really know if I'm being myself. I will have some moments, like last night playing Canasta with Tomás, where I feel normal again. And then there are other nights, like late night conversations in Sinclair's room, where I feel so misunderstood. Then when I try to clarify why I am the way I am, my explanation doesn't do me justice. I am fluid, my reactions change, I can't give you a reason why I don't hug you when I leave the room without putting myself in a box. And I don't like being in a box. 

I shouldn't have to explain who i am. 

I just am.

Give it time.

We will get to a point of understanding. 

I hope.

It's hard not to feel completely comfortable in your own home. I want to be me, but have always be nervous about how people perceive me. I'm jealous of Gretchen who is who she is without making excuses.  I hold back. And I don't know why. I'm just slower to open up than I thought I would be. I think it has a lot to do with being the youngest. Though I am an ambitious and independent woman, I still feel like I need that guidance. Someone else to pave the way. I can't do it unless I some experience or authority to tell me how. But I don't know anyone who's done this before. It's such strange thing, wonderful at times, with incredible potential, but slow to develop. Hopefully with Patience and Understanding - it will come.

Adventures in Portland

It was a beautiful weekend in the eclectic city of Portland, allowing for a few fun adventures with my roommates:

Friday: Since Renata, Gretchen and I all worked in the city on Friday, we had hoped our roommates would come out to join us for the evening of fun, but everyone was too tired to sit on the max for another 45 minutes. In the meanwhile, we decided to find a nice happy hour to get some dinner on Belmont. Little did we know that this was the one night a month that the Blue Monk featured belly dancers  during happy hour…. These belly dancing women were just people with regular day jobs who have a secret hobby on the side. It was strange. I just tried to eat my shrimp taco in peace and avert my eyes

On Saturday, as planned, Gretchen, Tomas, Justin and I woke up early, packed some lunches and set out on an epic bike ride into Portland to witness the annual Adult Soapbox Derby on Mt. Tabor. Maybe not so epic, I didn’t know what to expect from the 14 mile bike ride. But it was GREAT! We road the flat Springwater trail  to 45^th, then navigated our with through broken bike pedals and busy roads to Mt Tabor. We met up with our other roommates who had taken the Max in and enjoyed our lunches while watching Pigs in Space, spinning cups of coffee, and some more aerodynamic soapboxes speed down the windy road down the mountain. We next ventured to a local gourmet pizza joint for a cold beer and delicious slice before biking back to Gresham. A fabulous day spent outside.

Sunday: back into the city for Sunday market! It was like Seattle’s folk life festival, but it happens every Saturday and Sunday. There’s a whole stop on the Max dedicated to the market. The sights and smells were intoxicating. The number of colors and crafts were enough to make your head spin. After the market, it was to the now weekly Costco run, a lot of frustration, and over budget grocery list… but the day ended with a delicious community dinner and a night of paining the dining room in swimming caps and goggles and rocking out to death metal.

Yay for roommates.

Real World

I'm sitting in the Wallace Medical Concern downtown office off on Overton street just off of 21st. I'm two blocks from the trendy 23rd street and just on the edges of the pearl district. Because I'm working down town today, I gave a ride to my two roommates working downtown today with their placements at El Programa Hispano. It was weird to wake up and hop on the freeway and come into the city to work. This is the real world. I have a job - minus the pay, but a job none the less. When I'm done with work at six, or done with clinic at 10, I got home and don't have to do anything. I can sit around and work on the puzzle in the living room with my roommates without a lab report hanging over my head. I wake up in the morning and don't have to remember to print out my essay that's due or make sure I have all my notebooks for class. I make my self a sandwich and head off to work. It's weird. I don't feel old enough to have a "job."

That was what was on my mind this morning as I crossed the bridge to head into Portland.

Week One

Week one of work is done! It was a short week, but everyone of my housemates is exhausted. Some of us are overwhelmed by the amount of responsibility and knowledge required of our positions, while others are a little bored and waiting for the busy season to kick in. I am definitely overwhelmed, but so excited. I come home every day from work energized and excited for everything I get to do. I have A LOT to learn, but I just try and imagine myself a month from now having a much better handle on things.

I've already jumped into some work. Though it work didn't actually start till wednesday, I've already worked 5 days. I had a 3 hour training session with Prevent Blindness America on tuesday night to be certified to do pediatric visions screenings at the saturday pediatric clinics Wallace sponsors. Thursday was my first clinic day. I got to go down town and shadow my boss and the social work intern I'll be temporarily replacing on how to set up patients with primary care referrals and help them apply for free specialty care. It was great to see the process get started. Janelle, the intern, and I worked with a man recently released from his 10 year stint in prison to help him apply for a program that would allow him to get a free surgery that is necessary for him to be able to work manual labor, the only kind of job he is likely to get, and to find a primary care physician to help him manage his hypertension long term. He had zero money and no help from the government in finding a job. He explained to us how he was trying not to fall back into his patterns of violence and drug use so that he could support himself and he was so grateful that we could help him in his pursuit of staying clean. 

Friday was an interesting day. I went into the office to debrief clinic and help set up for the pediatric clinic, but everybody got to go home around 1pm because the bank in our parking lot was robbed and there was a bomb threat! Gotta love Gresham.

Saturday peds clinic was great! though I did have to get up earlier than I do on normal work days and give up my first saturday in Portland, it was probably the highlight of my week. I got to work with kids of poor families without health insurance and recommended a handful to get glasses. I got to speak some spanish with the families and volunteer interpreters and spent the day chatting about med schools with my fellow pre-med volunteers. 

I've got a lot to learn, but with my super nice co-workers and a boss who's constantly sending me home with her gourmet left-overs, I could not have asked for a better job.

Suprises

One thing that has surprised me is how Catholic everything is. I know that I joined the Jesuit volunteer Corps, but I guess I didn't realize what that meant. I really love and appreciate Jesuit ideas and their focus on action and reflection - understanding how you feel and why you feel that way, but Catholicism scares me. I don't understand it. It's like learning a whole new vocabulary and culture for things that should be simple. I don’t get the subtle jokes, the nuances of catholic culture. 5 of the 7 people in my house are Catholic, or grew up in the Catholic Church. They know all the motions, all the words to say, all the words to the liturgical music, and I sit, stand, and kneel with mild anxiety that I'm making a mistake and someone will stand up and say,  "SHE'S NOT CATHOLIC!" Greeting Parishioners, I feel like I'm lying. They assume I'm catholic, but I'm not. I feel like I need to confess to them like non-Catholics anonymous "Hello, my name is Erin Cooley, and I'm not a catholic." Fear stems from not understanding - I'm definitely a little frightened. 

 

But it's a good thing. I think. I’m surprised that I had so many preconceived notions and prejudices against Catholic people. I'm already having great conversations with my roommates about their upbringing in the Catholic Church. I ask a lot of questions about what stuff means, what I should and shouldn't do, sometimes with answers, sometimes not. It makes me want to understand more about my own Presbyterian upbringing and what I believe that differs from what they believe. Hopefully I can spend time researching church history and culture and more good conversations and growth can stem from my feelings of discomfort.

Finally in Gresham

After a week of deep introspection and hashing out what it means to live in community with my six new friends, I'm finally moved into my house in Gresham. Our house is interesting to say the least. It was built in the early 1900's as a convent for St. Henry's parish, but has served as the office building for El Programa Hispano - a non-profit resource for the Latino community in Gresham - for the past 25 years. For the last year and a half it has been vacant, but occasionally inhabited by homeless squatters. It shares a parking lot with the Parish's community center and a very small back yard with the youth director and his wife - our "support couple." The Parish is right across the street and my housemates and I spent time greeting the parishioners after the three masses yesterday and thanking them for their incredible generosity in donating the furnishings of our home and helping to fix it up. The house is still a work in progress, but livable. My favorite parts of the house are the lavender doors and molding, and sea-foam green cupboards and breakfast nook in the kitchen.

My roommates are amazing. Everyone is pretty down to earth, with the exception of one super A-type go getter from Nashville (Gretchen, who took the MCAT the same day I did). We have some conflicting ideas of what it means to live in an intentional community and to live simply, but we have yet to hash out the details of our weekly community and spirituality nights. Making any decision, such as what kind of milk to buy, and what kinds of foods are essentials take long winded discussions. We have to reach a consensus so that no one looses out and compromises what they want. But we've had some fun late night chats and are definitely bonding as a unit. This year will be full of adventure for sure.

And We're Off

The car is packed. I was able to fit all my stuff into one huge bag, 2 small bags and 3 small boxes, which might sound like a lot but is incredibly cut down from all the stuff I would cart back and forth to Whitworth with me, and I did give a way three big bags of clothes. It all fits in the trunk of my car, except for my guitar and bike. Still, I worry that I have too much stuff. I don't know how much is too much, how much my new roommates will have, how big my closet is. I hope I'm not "the girl with all that stuff" - but I'm just taking advantage of bringing my car down, right? Well, whether they judge me or not, I am meeting my new roommates in about 6 hours. Yikes! 

I'm just taking a leisurely morning to gather a last few things, clean my room after destroying it with all my crap this summer. Maybe a run to clear my head, printing some last minute tabs for my year of reconnecting with my guitar. Then I'm off. A 4 hour drive full of anticipation. Its here. I'm finally going. After months of dreaming and waiting I'm moving finally moving down to Oregon. Wish me luck!

Well, here I am. Finally taking a deep breath after months of preparation and anticipation. Tomorrow I take the MCAT, a test that will make or break my chances of getting into medical school, then I ship off to Portland, Oregon on monday to meet my six new roommates from all over the country and learn how to live a year of service, simplicity and environmental sustainability. Needless to say it's a little much to wrap my head around. I can't even think about packing up my life until this beast of a test is out of the way, but that will leave me a day and a half to prepare for my year in Oregon. And who wants to think about holding up in an air condition-less house packing in this unbearable heat! But it has to be done. 

My Fears:

•  Not doing well in the MCAT. My practice tests have been all over the board.

•  Forgetting how to speak spanish. I'm about to jump into a spanish-intensive position at the clinic and haven't spokane spanish in 2 months even after being asked to keep it up and refine my language skills by my clinic supervisor. But at least 4 of my housemates have spanish-speaking positions too, so we can practice together.

• The incredible amount of stuff I will be learning in the next month. I have to learn how to run a free medical clinic! And quick! They're giving me a lot of responsibility.

What I'm looking forward to:

• New People: My roommates sound super awesome and super diverse. I'm so excited to share this experience with them and to grow in an intentional community that will help me figure out how I want to live my life in the future.

• New City: Who doesn't love Portland? I'm excited to live somewhere than Washington State, though Portland is not too far and fairly familiar. Though I won't be right in the city, living in a city bigger than Spokane will be a breath of fresh air. 

• New Experiences: Being poor, working with a demographic that I haven't really interacted with much, not having easy access to Internet, and trying to establish environmentally sustainable living habits. 

The Adventure begins!