Catholicism and Conflict

Last night for sprituality night we had our neighbor/support couple/parish youth director over to facilitate a conversation about some beef my catholic housemates have with the catholic church. This stemmed from a contemplative mass we went to two weeks ago at the Jesuite parish where the homily reading were from the Genesis passage where Eve is created from Adam's rib, and a Gospel passage about marriage and divorce. The Homily left people wanting more. There was potential for so much to come from these readings and the priest kept his main points to that of  "Jesus thinks Divorce is a sin."

Our discussion was mainly centered around the role of women in the church and how the church can remain relevant in a changing society. I learned a lot about the priesthood, why it is limited to celibate men and so on. Crunchy (youth director) made an interesting point: the priest is in charge of so much, he is solely responsible for what goes on in his parish on the business end, the religious end, and everything in between ; so how could he do all that successfully and also be a good husband and father? But I asked how he sees that in relation to protestant churches. He said that in his experience, protestant churches have a big spread of power. There is a head pastor, and associate pastors, and deacons etc. But that doesn't work in the Catholic church because they try to maintain unity and "control" by keeping the chain of command very short.  If a bishop needs to check in with a parish, he only has to talk to one person to know everything that is going on in that parish. And the whole woman thing: besides Crunchy and the priests, all of the parish employees that make the church run are women. Many with masters in divinity. The same degree that priests have. So maybe there will be a change in the future. who knows....

But this discussion left me confused. I was learning a lot, but all this talk about catholicism was unsettling. After a conversation with my parents I realized what was bothering me... I think... The separation of Catholics and Protestants. I feel like I am placing so much emphasis on the differences when we come from the same family. I guess the minimal theology classes and history classes I took at Whitworth felt fairly ecumenical. Catholic church history is my church history too, to an extent. I can't reconcile the institutionalism of the catholic church. It is just such a big presence and personality that it's sometimes hard for me to see Christ beyond the politics. And to rub salt in the wound, I have a housemate who cannot miss a Sunday mass. Not that that is a bad thing, but he feels that it is a sin not to take communion every sunday at mass. So if I want to go to a protestant church and invite my housemates to join me (like I am this Sunday), he will wake up extra early to first go to mass, then come to my church service. I feel like he's saying I'm not good enough. But don't we worship the same God at each church? Doesn't God know what's on his heart when he sits down in a worship service? Where's the unity? Where's the trust? Where's the reconciliation? I don't know.